However, we could also probably tell you that if we only had "X" amount of time left on our clock we'd be living our lives a lot differently: giving more, making more time for those who matter most, giving up the meaningless things that seem to drain us of useful energy, and for some of us, start living life a little more for Christ.
BUT, "life just gets busy." That's all there is to it, right? There's so much to balance and never enough hours in a day to do every thing we'd like to do.
It's so easy to unintentionally forget your core priorities and true values when the pace of every day living hits; when the planner gets so packed you can't keep the to-do's straight and the days roll together, getting busier and busier. And every so often we have these moments of clarity that bring us back to our roots again. It seems like we tend to get these mini revolutions when we get on certain "kicks." Going to church again kicks, workout kicks, healthy eating kicks, kicks where we set goals to make a certain someone in our life a bigger priority. And it usually goes really well (at first).. And then we blame the beautiful thing called "life" for getting in the way again, as our "kicks" become a little less important and then a little less, until eventually we're back in the "look ahead" lifestyle.
Stress causes a whirlwind of emotions, and can do this nasty thing where it turns us into someone we don't intend to be - someone so far from who we are at our core. Funny, isn't it? We, as a society, get so caught up in building the life we dream of, that we forget we are given the gift of this "here-and-now" life each day.
As many of you know, I started the Chiropractic program at Cleveland University earlier this fall. (What an experience and a blessing it has been). Through the first few weeks of school I found myself in the state I've been describing again- the to-do list crazy, busy, "I don't have time for this" mentality. I went from a full time college student of 12 credit hours to 27 credit hours, a couple classes a day (if that) to up to 7 classes a day, from studying a couple hours a week to an average of six hours per day.
Life got really intense really fast, and trying to keep my head above the water school-wise became my number one priority even faster. I hadn't been in this state since before my diagnosis. And the worst part of it all was that I didn't even realize how I was living my day to day life without expressing true gratitude. I began to blow off essential therapies in order to study, I quit some of the most important pieces of my new lifestyle to make more time for school, and didn't connect to my core values nearly as much as I use to.
Two weeks ago Sunday, one of my classmates asked me to go try out a new church with her, and honestly she'll never know how much that meant to me. That morning was a true wake up call, "Hellooo Jess, do you remember the last six months of your life? They weren't a dream sweetheart!! It's time to wake up again girl friend." BAM. Like a punch to the stomach. A flood of emotions came over me throughout various points of that day.
Although I have this wonderful opportunity of going to school to become a doctor right in front of me, and although it requires a tremendous amount of discipline and consumes a lot of time - it is not my entire life.
I have always said that I've been given an immaculate gift of a second chance at living... but honestly, we're all given that each and every morning when we wake up. I had stopped appreciating the beauty of that when I let the business of the world overcome my inner being.
Which got me thinking, all of this could be taken from me at any moment again, just like it had last year. I was a "typical" college student. Again, spending so much of my energy worrying about exams and school, when all of sudden that life was ripped from me. Which was hands down the most humbling, yet earth shattering experience I've ever encountered. But God taught me the greatest lesson through all of that pain: never lose sight of me.
So what is truly mine? In the end, the only thing that cannot be taken from us tomorrow is the impact we've had on other people's lives, the relationships we've built with the ones we love, and our relationship with God. The rest is JUST extra.
It's easy to lose sight of, we're human. None of us will ever be perfect, though we strive to be.
Life kind of becomes a series of finding our way and then getting lost again.
But the most beautiful thing about it: you're never too lost to find your way back to God.
You're never too far gone to live an abundant life in Him.
And HE is NEVER too busy for you.
The most beautiful thing is the more you live in Christ, the more you realize what true fulfillment is. Im willing to bet you are worthy of so much more than you give yourself.
It isn't new clothes, an A on an exam, a new job, or losing ten pounds (although, they are all pretty great and I wouldn't mind any of them coming my way).
It's being truly happy with who you are as a person, giving pieces of yourself to people, places, and things that could never repay you, waking up each day just honestly being glad to be alive.
It's living for something greater than yourself and giving from the goodness of your soul.
It's not about knowing the bible cover to cover or being the most "put together" in the front pew at church every Sunday.
It's establishing a relationship. It's praying even when you don't need anything. It's giving your baggage to God and sureendering your life to being a little more like Him.
Don't be too busy dreaming that you forget to wake up and truly live.